Sometimes we have way too much time to think. I do for sure. Today I got to thinking about being 52 and well, very overweight. I also got to thinking about how I used to be pretty and even when I wasn't pretty in person I was photogenic. There were times when I actually looked good. I do not see that anymore. When I look at pictures of myself now, I literally want to cry. I avoid mirriors as much as I can and well, I am just not happy with myself.
Today I got to thinking that I really do not want a man in my life but I want to be the kind of woman a man looks at. I realized that even though I am 52 I could still be attractive, I could still turn heads and well darn it, as starnge as that sounds, I want to turn heads.
My main inspiration today for getting my butt in gear and really getting on track is that I want to have the good looking guys in the Mad T Party Band actually look at me next year. I know, I know, they could be my kids. That is ok...I still want to be looked at in that special way...I can get back to that even at my age... but it is all in my hands.
I am not comfortable with myself right now, I do not like feeling all this fat when I sit down. It bothers me. I do not feel attractive and so I want to get to a weight where I feel attractive again. No I do not WABT to, I WILL get to that weight. It is in me, and I will get there. Wanting it won't happen, that is not enough, I have to just do it. Sadly it is not easy.
Today was day 2 and I have done good so far. I stayed under 1000 calories, drank a lot of water and am going to do some exercises.
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